Saturday 23 January 2016

Ibukun Awosika, one of Nigeria's most successful and influential women Unvieils the keys to Successful life and Marriage

Mrs. Ibukun Awosika the Chairman of First Bank of Nigeria Limited
Here is an interview with Mrs. Ibukun Awosika, one of Nigeria's most successful and influential women. The interview was recorded at an exclusive session she had recently with a group of young enterprising Ladies here in Lagos, Nigeria.
As i stated earlier, this year i and my team will go the the extra mile to hunt, gather, research, interview, package and present inspiration and life transforming information and publish it here.


Read the wisdom and understanding of Mrs. Ibukun Awosika the Chairman of First Bank of Nigeria Limited. She is the  founder and CEO of The Chair Centre Group- The companies in the group include The Chair Centre Limited, Sokoa Chair Centre Limited, Furniture Manufacturers Mart Limited, and TCC Systems and Services Limited and are involved in furniture manufacturing, retail and bank-way security systems services. Ibukun serves on a number of corporate and not-for-profit boards amongst which are: Cadbury Nigeria Plc., Convention on Business Integrity (CBI), and the Nigerian Sovereign Investment Authority.
Advise for singles
If you are walking down the road, with the wrong man, you are in trouble. You cannot afford to make a mistake.
Don’t get married until you have a sense of who you are.
You have to take this seriously because your life is on assignment. You are accountable to God for your life.
Your life has three parts:
1. Who you are
2. After a while, you get the added responsibility of a wife. This does not replace who you are. Your role as a wife is to help a man be the best of himself, not to diminish yourself
3. After a while, you get the added responsibility of a mother
One part does not remove the other, and it is your responsibility to work out how the three will combine together.
When you know who you are, you will know what to look out for when you are looking for a partner.
You won’t be carried away by “Rich, Tall and Handsome”, Instead you will be looking for someone who can help you to achieve what you are born to achieve.
If you marry the wrong person, and there is a mismatch, there will be a great conflict.
You owe it to yourself not to settle.
Don’t ever settle until you are comfortable that this person you want to marry has your back and will allow you to fly.
If you don’t know who you are, you can start by knowing what you don’t want, and be honest with yourself.
Don’t get carried away with the butterflies in your tummy.
When you are deciding on a man to marry:
Pick a man who is responsible and who is working hard. He may not have made it yet, but at least he is working and he has a vision.
It is not your job to give your husband-to-be a vision. You can’t change him. Make sure that he already has a personal vision of what he wants to become and is already working towards it.
Please take note of this:
The son of a rich man is not a rich boy.
He will take you out on dates in a big car. It is not his car, it’s his father’s car. He borrowed it.
His father will throw a big party for the two of you when you are getting married. This is for his own ego. The father can even pay 2 years house rent for you to impress the inlaws, and hence you might not realize that you are in trouble.
When the marriage starts, it will dawn on you that the boy you married, does not have any money.
He is always dependent on his daddy.
The day daddy does not give him money, you guys will not have money.
All the responsibilities will fall on your head, and this will cause friction in the marriage.
Be warned my daughters.
You can prevent yourself from entering trouble.
Advise for Married Women
At first when you start a business, your husband might seem supportive because he thinks it is just a business to keep you busy.
But as the business becomes successful, he gets scared.
He gets scared because he feels that you might become something else. He has heard so many stories of women who have become rich and are now terrible. He is scared that you might not be able to balance it all.
You have the power to manage this transition.
1. Don’t start what you cannot finish
Breakfast in bed
Cooking fresh food everyday
The day you become busy and you cannot make breakfast in bed, he will say you have changed and will start treating you as if you are a horrible person
2. Make your husband a stakeholder in everything you do
You must have heard people say:
Your husband’s money is your money
Your money is your money
This is bad advice
If your husband has no stake in what you do, what is his benefit? You are making money everyday and you are still asking for housekeeping. After a while, he will begin to despise you.
All this money you are making, you can’t even help out in the house.
One of the wise things you can do is to empower him.
For example, you can say, “Let me take care of the house bills, you can use your money to build us a house”
When he sees how your money is helping him, he begins to get invested in what you do; he wants you to succeed because your success takes some burden off his shoulders.
Please note: This is why you should marry a hardworking man, who will not take advantage of you because you are contributing to the homefront. If you marry a reasonable man, he won’t start spending his money on other women because you are helping out.
Money is a very sensitive topic in a marriage because it can break a home. A lot of ladies take advice from the older generation, forgetting that the generation of our mothers is not the same as our generation.
In that generation, not a lot of women were career focused.
In this generation, it is the norm for women to be career focused, and hence, the dynamics has changed, and we have to deal with that dynamic.
God knows what he was saying when he said, husband and wife are one
The two of you are one and he can bless the one through any of the halves of the one. He can bless the husband or the wife, but it does not change who is in charge.
Your husband is in charge of your home and you should never have illegal leadership because you have money
Money is nothing.
It is just a tool you can use to achieve what God has ordained for you.
Don’t allow money to control your home. If you do, you are in trouble.
When you understand this, you won’t become arrogant because you are making money.
I want you to understand this because we need to raise a critical mass of women who can be successful and use money wisely, so that men can become comfortable with successful women and it can be easier for our children to become successful
You also need to understand that your husband is facing so many things:
Pressure from in laws
Pressure from friends
They will be telling him things about you, hence you have to be careful.
Don’t keep secrets from him, secrets breed mistrust.
If you want to invest in property, let him know what you are doing.
If you don’t trust your husband, you can keep the asset in your name or in your children’s name.
If you trust your husband, you can buy property and keep the asset in the both of you’s name.
If you have plenty cash, invest in assets immediately. If your husband knows that you are sitting on so much cash, he will ask you for it and if you don’t give it to him…trouble. You become the enemy.
Wisdom my daughters, you need wisdom.
Tomorrow we shall share her advice, Insights and words of wisdom on business. Dont miss it. Its a must read. See you. 
=In the meantime share your views on this.
As in, I wanted to interview people and I wanted the people I interview to open up, and to share things that will change the lives of the listeners forever. I wanted the people listening to have defining moments by virtue of the interview.
I have been recording the “Build Your Online Empire” Podcast series that is set to launch in January, and the interviews have been phenomenal. People are sharing things they have never said anywhere before, I feel like Oprah. Hahahahahahahaha.
Mrs Awosika’s interview brought the room down, and I was just weak. The testimonials have been all over Instagram, if you search for #tfdseries, you will see what I am talking about
We recorded the event, and hence there will be CDs of the event, but I decided to share my notes with you.
I wrote 42 pages.
Lol…you know I don’t play with personal development.
I can’t type out the 42 pages, but I have summarized the points into 3 key areas.

Advise for singles

If you are walking down the road, with the wrong man, you are in trouble. You cannot afford to make a mistake.
Don’t get married until you have a sense of who you are.
You have to take this seriously because your life is on assignment. You are accountable to God for your life.
Your life has three parts:
1. Who you are
2. After a while, you get the added responsibility of a wife. This does not replace who you are. Your role as a wife is to help a man be the best of himself, not to diminish yourself
3. After a while, you get the added responsibility of a mother
One part does not remove the other, and it is your responsibility to work out how the three will combine together.
When you know who you are, you will know what to look out for when you are looking for a partner.
You won’t be carried away by “Rich, Tall and Handsome”, Instead you will be looking for someone who can help you to achieve what you are born to achieve.
If you marry the wrong person, and there is a mismatch, there will be a great conflict.
You owe it to yourself not to settle.
Don’t ever settle until you are comfortable that this person you want to marry has your back and will allow you to fly.
If you don’t know who you are, you can start by knowing what you don’t want, and be honest with yourself.
Don’t get carried away with the butterflies in your tummy.
When you are deciding on a man to marry:
Pick a man who is responsible and who is working hard. He may not have made it yet, but at least he is working and he has a vision.
It is not your job to give your husband-to-be a vision. You can’t change him. Make sure that he already has a personal vision of what he wants to become and is already working towards it.
Please take note of this:
The son of a rich man is not a rich boy.
He will take you out on dates in a big car. It is not his car, it’s his father’s car. He borrowed it.
His father will throw a big party for the two of you when you are getting married. This is for his own ego. The father can even pay 2 years house rent for you to impress the inlaws, and hence you might not realize that you are in trouble.
When the marriage starts, it will dawn on you that the boy you married, does not have any money.
He is always dependent on his daddy.
The day daddy does not give him money, you guys will not have money.
All the responsibilities will fall on your head, and this will cause friction in the marriage.
Be warned my daughters.
You can prevent yourself from entering trouble.
Advise for Married Women
At first when you start a business, your husband might seem supportive because he thinks it is just a business to keep you busy.
But as the business becomes successful, he gets scared.
He gets scared because he feels that you might become something else. He has heard so many stories of women who have become rich and are now terrible. He is scared that you might not be able to balance it all.
You have the power to manage this transition.
1. Don’t start what you cannot finish
Breakfast in bed
Cooking fresh food everyday
The day you become busy and you cannot make breakfast in bed, he will say you have changed and will start treating you as if you are a horrible person
2. Make your husband a stakeholder in everything you do
You must have heard people say:
Your husband’s money is your money
Your money is your money
This is bad advice
If your husband has no stake in what you do, what is his benefit? You are making money everyday and you are still asking for housekeeping. After a while, he will begin to despise you.
All this money you are making, you can’t even help out in the house.
One of the wise things you can do is to empower him.
For example, you can say, “Let me take care of the house bills, you can use your money to build us a house”
When he sees how your money is helping him, he begins to get invested in what you do; he wants you to succeed because your success takes some burden off his shoulders.
Please note: This is why you should marry a hardworking man, who will not take advantage of you because you are contributing to the homefront. If you marry a reasonable man, he won’t start spending his money on other women because you are helping out.
Money is a very sensitive topic in a marriage because it can break a home. A lot of ladies take advice from the older generation, forgetting that the generation of our mothers is not the same as our generation.
In that generation, not a lot of women were career focused.
In this generation, it is the norm for women to be career focused, and hence, the dynamics has changed, and we have to deal with that dynamic.
God knows what he was saying when he said, husband and wife are one
The two of you are one and he can bless the one through any of the halves of the one. He can bless the husband or the wife, but it does not change who is in charge.
Your husband is in charge of your home and you should never have illegal leadership because you have money
Money is nothing.
It is just a tool you can use to achieve what God has ordained for you.
Don’t allow money to control your home. If you do, you are in trouble.
When you understand this, you won’t become arrogant because you are making money.
I want you to understand this because we need to raise a critical mass of women who can be successful and use money wisely, so that men can become comfortable with successful women and it can be easier for our children to become successful
You also need to understand that your husband is facing so many things:
Pressure from inlaws
Pressure from friends
They will be telling him things about you, hence you have to be careful.
Don’t keep secrets from him, secrets breed mistrust.
If you want to invest in property, let him know what you are doing.
If you don’t trust your husband, you can keep the asset in your name or in your children’s name.
If you trust your husband, you can buy property and keep the asset in the both of you’s name.
If you have plenty cash, invest in assets immediately. If your husband knows that you are sitting on so much cash, he will ask you for it and if you don’t give it to him…trouble. You become the enemy.
Wisdom my daughters, you need wisdom.
- See more at: http://www.stephanieobi.com/business-advice/ibukun-awosika/#sthash.lIuuybPY.dpuf
As in, I wanted to interview people and I wanted the people I interview to open up, and to share things that will change the lives of the listeners forever. I wanted the people listening to have defining moments by virtue of the interview.
I have been recording the “Build Your Online Empire” Podcast series that is set to launch in January, and the interviews have been phenomenal. People are sharing things they have never said anywhere before, I feel like Oprah. Hahahahahahahaha.
Mrs Awosika’s interview brought the room down, and I was just weak. The testimonials have been all over Instagram, if you search for #tfdseries, you will see what I am talking about
We recorded the event, and hence there will be CDs of the event, but I decided to share my notes with you.
I wrote 42 pages.
Lol…you know I don’t play with personal development.
I can’t type out the 42 pages, but I have summarized the points into 3 key areas.

Advise for singles

If you are walking down the road, with the wrong man, you are in trouble. You cannot afford to make a mistake.
Don’t get married until you have a sense of who you are.
You have to take this seriously because your life is on assignment. You are accountable to God for your life.
Your life has three parts:
1. Who you are
2. After a while, you get the added responsibility of a wife. This does not replace who you are. Your role as a wife is to help a man be the best of himself, not to diminish yourself
3. After a while, you get the added responsibility of a mother
One part does not remove the other, and it is your responsibility to work out how the three will combine together.
When you know who you are, you will know what to look out for when you are looking for a partner.
You won’t be carried away by “Rich, Tall and Handsome”, Instead you will be looking for someone who can help you to achieve what you are born to achieve.
If you marry the wrong person, and there is a mismatch, there will be a great conflict.
You owe it to yourself not to settle.
Don’t ever settle until you are comfortable that this person you want to marry has your back and will allow you to fly.
If you don’t know who you are, you can start by knowing what you don’t want, and be honest with yourself.
Don’t get carried away with the butterflies in your tummy.
When you are deciding on a man to marry:
Pick a man who is responsible and who is working hard. He may not have made it yet, but at least he is working and he has a vision.
It is not your job to give your husband-to-be a vision. You can’t change him. Make sure that he already has a personal vision of what he wants to become and is already working towards it.
Please take note of this:
The son of a rich man is not a rich boy.
He will take you out on dates in a big car. It is not his car, it’s his father’s car. He borrowed it.
His father will throw a big party for the two of you when you are getting married. This is for his own ego. The father can even pay 2 years house rent for you to impress the inlaws, and hence you might not realize that you are in trouble.
When the marriage starts, it will dawn on you that the boy you married, does not have any money.
He is always dependent on his daddy.
The day daddy does not give him money, you guys will not have money.
All the responsibilities will fall on your head, and this will cause friction in the marriage.
Be warned my daughters.
You can prevent yourself from entering trouble.
Advise for Married Women
At first when you start a business, your husband might seem supportive because he thinks it is just a business to keep you busy.
But as the business becomes successful, he gets scared.
He gets scared because he feels that you might become something else. He has heard so many stories of women who have become rich and are now terrible. He is scared that you might not be able to balance it all.
You have the power to manage this transition.
1. Don’t start what you cannot finish
Breakfast in bed
Cooking fresh food everyday
The day you become busy and you cannot make breakfast in bed, he will say you have changed and will start treating you as if you are a horrible person
2. Make your husband a stakeholder in everything you do
You must have heard people say:
Your husband’s money is your money
Your money is your money
This is bad advice
If your husband has no stake in what you do, what is his benefit? You are making money everyday and you are still asking for housekeeping. After a while, he will begin to despise you.
All this money you are making, you can’t even help out in the house.
One of the wise things you can do is to empower him.
For example, you can say, “Let me take care of the house bills, you can use your money to build us a house”
When he sees how your money is helping him, he begins to get invested in what you do; he wants you to succeed because your success takes some burden off his shoulders.
Please note: This is why you should marry a hardworking man, who will not take advantage of you because you are contributing to the homefront. If you marry a reasonable man, he won’t start spending his money on other women because you are helping out.
Money is a very sensitive topic in a marriage because it can break a home. A lot of ladies take advice from the older generation, forgetting that the generation of our mothers is not the same as our generation.
In that generation, not a lot of women were career focused.
In this generation, it is the norm for women to be career focused, and hence, the dynamics has changed, and we have to deal with that dynamic.
God knows what he was saying when he said, husband and wife are one
The two of you are one and he can bless the one through any of the halves of the one. He can bless the husband or the wife, but it does not change who is in charge.
Your husband is in charge of your home and you should never have illegal leadership because you have money
Money is nothing.
It is just a tool you can use to achieve what God has ordained for you.
Don’t allow money to control your home. If you do, you are in trouble.
When you understand this, you won’t become arrogant because you are making money.
I want you to understand this because we need to raise a critical mass of women who can be successful and use money wisely, so that men can become comfortable with successful women and it can be easier for our children to become successful
You also need to understand that your husband is facing so many things:
Pressure from inlaws
Pressure from friends
They will be telling him things about you, hence you have to be careful.
Don’t keep secrets from him, secrets breed mistrust.
If you want to invest in property, let him know what you are doing.
If you don’t trust your husband, you can keep the asset in your name or in your children’s name.
If you trust your husband, you can buy property and keep the asset in the both of you’s name.
If you have plenty cash, invest in assets immediately. If your husband knows that you are sitting on so much cash, he will ask you for it and if you don’t give it to him…trouble. You become the enemy.
Wisdom my daughters, you need wisdom.
- See more at: http://www.stephanieobi.com/business-advice/ibukun-awosika/#sthash.lIuuybPY.dpuf

No comments:

Post a Comment